Cold Exteriors and a Warm Heart
by happysleepdays
Summary: I hate commitment and I hate responsibilities. Therefore, I don't like making friends. However, after meeting a certain white-haired, blue-eyed individual, I might be obligated to change my opinion.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Cold Days Need Warm Hugs**

Cold.

It was cold.

I opened my eyes and all I could see was white. White bits floated down from the sky towards my face and melted immediately upon coming into contact with the warm surface. I reached out my hand towards the snow, trying to catch some snowflakes into the palm of my hand.

 _Where am I?_

I closed my eyes again.

 _Why am I here?_

I supposed it didn't really matter; despite the cold, all I wanted to do was just sit here and do nothing. The feeling of having no obligations, no worries, and no duties was so liberating…so _free_.

I had almost fallen asleep again when I heard a faint shout. The voice got closer and closer until I could clearly hear the words that were being said to me.

"Hey you! Are you okay?"

I didn't respond. I didn't want to meet people. Meeting people meant making friends, and I was reveling in this feeling of freedom too much to care at the moment. _Maybe if I don't respond, they'll think I'm dead and they'll leave._

I heard the sound of feet moving through the freshly fallen snow getting closer and closer. Two hands suddenly grabbed my shoulders and started shaking me while I was lifted up to a sitting position. My eyes flew open and I saw the person who had so rudely interrupted my serenity. A boy around my age knelt in front of me, eyebrows scrunched up in worry. I stared at him; his hair was so white it almost blended into the background and his eyes were an icy, teal blue.

"Are you okay?" he repeated, hands still shaking my shoulders.

"Well I won't be if you keep shaking me," I replied, voice shaky from the movement, "Stop it."

He immediately stopped and looked to the side, "Sorry."

I looked at his clothing, he was wearing a short sleeved shirt along with a pair of matching shorts. "Are _you_ okay? Aren't you cold?"

He looked surprised at my question, "I don't get cold," he replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Why not?"  
"I just don't."

"But _why_?"  
"I _just don't_ , okay?!" Frustrated, he got up on his feet and began dusting the snow off his knees. "Anyways, I was just checking to see if you were alive since I would feel kind of bad if someone died and I didn't do anything. You're clearly fine so I'll be going now." He began to walk away.

"Wait!" I got to my feet and began to follow behind him. _Why am I following him? I thought I didn't want to make friends, I thought I wanted to be free._ Despite these thoughts, I continued to walk after him. He was slightly taller than me, I observed.

He suddenly stopped and turned around, irritated, "Why are you following me? Go home!" he turned his back and started walking faster towards his destination.

I jogged to catch up to his side, "I don't have one."

I saw his eyes flicker to me for a second before he scrunched up his brows, something he did a lot, "What do you mean you don't have one? Where are you planning to go when I leave?"

"I don't know." I looked around at my surroundings for the first time. I turned my head to look as we passed by some wooden houses. I saw several children peering out the window at us. They caught my gaze and immediately ducked down out of sight. I frowned, but didn't say anything and continued walking.

The boy was saying something to me, most of which I didn't hear as I was immersed in my own thoughts. He seemed to realize this and grabbed my shoulder (again) while peering down at me. "Hello? Are you even listening? Hey you!" He waved his free hand in front of my face.

I looked up at him, annoyed. "Can you stop calling me 'you'? I have a name."

He looked slightly abashed and released my shoulder, "Well what is it then?"

"Kimura Shizuka." _How did I know my name? I don't even know how I got here or where 'here' even is._ But at the same time, it felt so natural saying my name, as if I had said it many times before.

"Well as I was saying Kimura, I'm going back home right now so I think it would be best if you went back to wherever you came from."

"But I don't even know where I came from. All I remember is being cold, waking up and seeing white. And then you showed up." I was lagging behind again, and had to speed walk to keep up with his brisk pace.

He stopped in his tracks, causing me to run into his back. "Ow, what was that for? Why did you stop walking?" I glared at him as I held my now sore nose.

The boy looked at me carefully, as if he was examining me. I stared back at him with a questioning gaze. After a few seconds, he gave a deep sigh and said softly, "Do you want to come back to my house with me?"

I blinked a few times, "Can I?"

"I'm asking you right now, aren't I?" He looked at me exasperatedly, one hand scratching his head.  
My face slowly broke into a smile, a warm feeling began to stir inside of me, "Yes, I do."

"Well then hurry up, slowpoke!" He turned around and resumed walking.

I followed behind him, still grinning. Despite the freezing weather, I felt warm for the first time. It was a warm feeling in my chest developed from the feeling of getting to know someone. A feeling developed from making a _friend_.

"What's _your_ name, by the way?"

Teal eyes looked back at me, "Toshiro. Hitsugaya Toshiro."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: What Makes a House a Home**

We had been walking for a fairly long time already and I had stopped seeing houses and people a while ago. Toshiro and I chatted as we walked and I deduced three things from our conversation. Number one: he liked to call people by their last name. I wasn't sure whether this only applied to me since I hadn't seen him talk to anyone else but he seemed to be very adamant on calling me "Kimura" as opposed to "Shizuka". This slightly bothered me, but I gave up after he continued to call me by my last name after I told him he could call me "Shizuka" twice. Number two: despite his preference towards calling others by their surname, he didn't seem to mind me calling him by his first name. That was a plus for me since Hitsugaya was quite a mouthful. And lastly, he was actually really childish which greatly contrasted with the tough exterior he tried to put up. The gruff words he used to describe his childhood friend "Bedwetter Momo" and his grandmother became redundant when I realized how much he cared about them.

It also came to my attention that the clothes that I was wearing were not very warm, which was probably why I was so cold. From what I could see of the clothing, I was wearing a dark blue kimono with subtle, light-blue floral patterns at the bottom. Despite myself judging Toshiro on his choice of clothing, I realized that my own were not much better. I hoped we were close to Toshiro's house because I was beginning to lose feeling in my fingers and toes.

I was about to ask Toshiro how much longer it was going to take when a wooden house came into view.

"We're here," he stated, breaking into a smile. He ran ahead into the house shouting, "Grandmother! I'm back!"

I stood outside awkwardly, it seemed impolite to just walk into someone's house so I just waited for him to come back. After a few moments, Toshiro came back outside with an elderly lady following behind him.

"This is Kimura Shizuka," he began, gesturing to me, "But I just call her Kimura."

His grandmother smiled warmly towards me, "It's nice to meet you Kimura-chan. Shiro-chan has told me that you do not have a home."

My cheeks reddened, I felt so embarrassed about intruding on this family – this _home_. I gave a deep bow and stared at the ground while I spoke, "Yes, I apologize for intruding. I just woke up in the middle of nowhere and I – I don't have anywhere to go and –"

A hand placed itself on my shoulder. I looked up and saw Toshiro's grandmother still smiling at me, "You are welcome to stay here with us."

I was at a loss for words and stared at her, she was so kind to accept a complete stranger into her home. She accepted someone who she had no obligations towards simply because I said I needed somewhere to stay. _And to think I was going to ignore Toshiro when he first approached me._

"Thank you so much!" I straightened up and wrapped my arms around her small figure tightly. "I promise I won't be a burden! I'll help you and work even harder than Toshiro ever has in his life!"

"I'd appreciate it if you didn't strangle my grandmother to death, Kimura," a flat voice replied. Toshiro had his arms crossed across his chest and an annoyed look on his face, "And what was that about being working harder than me?"

Ignoring his comment, I let go of his grandmother and clasped her petite hands in mine, "You can refer to me as your new granddaughter. Just call me Shizuka-chan, okay?"

"Hey Kimura, let go of _my_ grandmother!"

"Geez, no need to be so clingy, _Shiro-chan_."

"What did you call me?!"

* * *

After more moments of me thanking Toshiro's grandmother profusely and him trying to separate us, the three of us settled into their house. His grandmother told me to make myself comfortable as she prepared dinner for us and Toshiro went into a different room in the house.

I looked around the residence and sat down in a corner of the room. Two tatami mats lay at the side and a third one was rolled up and placed in the corner across from me. There was barely any furniture, which made me start to feel bad once again for intruding when I realized that they were probably not very well off.

"We may not have a lot of luxuries, but we always have enough for food and essentials. Besides, that's all we really need." Toshiro's voice came behind me. He sat down beside me and held out a bag of amanatto beans. "So stop looking like that."

"Like what?" I asked, reaching out to take some.

"Like you've taken candy from a child or something."

I froze, hand still in the bag and slowly looked up at him, then back to my hand, then back to him. "Uh – "

"Shut up! I already know what you're thinking so don't even say anything."

…

"I wasn't going to – "

"Give me back my beans!"

I laughed and put two beans in my mouth. I looked across the room and watched his grandmother as she prepared food. "Hey Toshiro?"

"What?"

"Why are you letting me stay here? People don't exactly pick people off the streets and let them live in their houses."

He paused in the middle of eating for a moment, then continued to chew slowly as if he was thinking it over. "You said you didn't remember anything and that all you saw was white."

"Yeah, and?"

"I remember that happening to me too. It means you're a new soul here, you've just arrived from the world of the living."

"Okay?" I didn't understand what he was trying to say.

"You've only just arrived…and you're here, in District 1 of Junrinan."

I furrowed my eyebrows, "I really have _no_ idea what – "

"Just let me finish!" he snapped, he shook his head, trying to recollect his thoughts, "We're in a place called Rukongai; it's where most of the people in Soul Society live. Rukongai is divided four sections: North, East, South, and West. And each of those are divided into many different districts that are numbered. Like I said before, we're in District 1 in West Rukongai right now."

I nodded to show that I understood what he was saying so far.

"District 1 is the closest to Seireitei, which is at the center of Soul Society. The further you get from the center, the most chaotic and poor the District is. Therefore, this is the most peaceful and lawful district you could possibly live in."

I opened my mouth and was about to ask where this was all headed when he shot me a look and continued.

"Now the big issue here is you. When souls arrive in Soul Society, they get sent to random districts. However, these Districts are usually always between the number of 50-80. It is extremely rare for someone to be sent to one of the top 50 Districts, let alone _District 1_." He looked at me carefully, "And that's why I decided that you were worth the hassle of bringing to my house. Because either you must have some really special powers or you must have done something incredibly amazing in your past life in order to get here."

"But aren't you from this District too? Why is it such a big deal if I arrived here?"

"I didn't arrive here. I was originally from District 18. I overheard some villagers talking about how the higher Districts were more quiet and peaceful and I figured that there should be less people living here. I don't like when there's a lot of people; they tend to discriminate." I saw his hands grip the bag of candied beans tighter. "Anyways, my grandmother isn't my _real_ grandmother, obviously, but she's pretty close to the real thing. She adopted me when I arrived here in District 1 and I had nowhere to go." He gave a small smile as he recalled the memory.

I stared numbly at him, "Oh." _I didn't expect him to have such an elaborate reason behind this._

 _So is he helping me because he's reminded of himself when he sees me? Does he want me to do something for him?_

"And before you start questioning me if I have some ulterior motive behind this – no, I don't." He leaned against the wall and looked up at the ceiling. "Well, maybe I do."

I felt my heart quicken. _D_ _oes he want me to use my "special powers" or whatever on him? Because I have no idea what that was about and –_

Toshiro turned to me suddenly and asked, "Do you know what a Shinigami is?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Friends Always Have Your Back**

I stood in front the entrance to the large institution known as Shin'o Academy, gaping at the amount of people that were present. _Whoa, I never thought that there would be this many people here._

"Stop staring like you've never seen souls before and let's go inside!" A rough hand grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards the doors. "The faster we get registered, the faster we can do the test, and the faster we can go home."

It had been two weeks since I came to stay with Toshiro and his grandmother. I did my best to stay true to my words and tried to learn how to do the various chores around the house. There was only one problem: I _hated_ responsibilities. I was constantly scolding myself for promising to do the things that I hated the most like laundry or cleaning the house. However, I did them to the best of my ability and was usually quite proud of the finished results.

Toshiro helped me occasionally with the chores he thought were less laborious, such as going into town to buy food and supplies or cutting fruit (especially watermelon).

As he navigated us between the crowds of people and into the building towards the registration desk, I thought back to two weeks earlier, when Toshiro had introduced me to the concept of Shinigami.

* * *

 _ **Two weeks earlier**_

"There's a school that Momo goes to…a Shinigami school. You learn skills and techniques that a Shinigami needs and you get to meet other people that are like us. About a week ago, I met a Shinigami. She didn't exactly look like a very reliable Shinigami…nor did she act like one either," Toshiro recalled, shuddering at the memory. "However, she _was_ able to trace me back to this house and told me that I had a large amount of reiatsu, which is my spiritual energy."

"Is that supposed to be a bad thing?"

"It is when you're unconsciously hurting your grandmother in your sleep because of it," Toshiro's head dropped slightly, eyes looking downwards as if ashamed. "The Shinigami told me that if don't learn to control this soon, I'm going to end up killing her." His head snapped up to look at me, "And that's why I'm planning on attending Momo's school, so I can learn to control my power and be able to protect Grandmother instead of hurting her," he told me.

I looked back at him for a while, taking in everything he had said. "Wait, before you said 'people like us'. How do I fit into this?"

"I know I don't have a clue about the techniques of controlling spiritual energy or sensing it, but one thing I know for sure is that you're really similar to me. I don't know how to describe it but I can just…feel it." Toshiro frowned, frustrated at not being able to put what he was feeling into words.

I slowly nodded, "I think I know what you mean. It's like you have a similar aura, like we're on the same level."

The white-haired boy smiled, "Yeah, something like that. So what I said before about having an ulterior motive behind allowing you to stay here…I want you to enrol into the Shinigami school with me."

 _ **End Flashback**_

* * *

I was brought back into the present when Toshiro stopped abruptly, causing me to crash into his back. Holding my now sore nose, I was about to complain when I saw that we had reached our destination.

He let go of my wrist slowly and turned towards me. "We're here. Are you ready?" he asked.

I looked straight into his teal eyes and said straightforwardly, "Of course not, how could you even ask that?!" I frowned at the thought of studying. Despite not being able to remember anything from my time in the living world, I knew I was definitely not the kind of hard-working student who was at the top of the class.

"Hah?!"

"But even if I'm not ready I still have to go through with this, right?" I gave him an uneasy smile. "We're doing this so we can protect Grandmother."  
He returned my smile, and we walked up to the registration desk. The Shinigami (as I deduced, given by the black kimono she wore) looked up at us with a bored expression for a few seconds and then gestured for us to move forward so she could slap a numbered sticker on each of our chests. She then pointed towards another set of doors to our right and said, "The testing room is in there, just stay there and wait for your number to be called."

Toshiro and I nodded and proceeded to walk in the directions she had guided us towards.

"Shouldn't she have taken our names or something?" I inquired. How were they supposed to identify us with only these number?

"They're not going to waste their time doing that when they don't even know if we have enough reiatsu."

I rolled my eyes at his tone, Toshiro was such a smart-aleck sometimes.

Looking around at all the people in the room, I was slightly awed at the wide variety of people that I saw: old people, young people, thin people, bulky people. I supposed that the physical stature didn't really matter though, since this was supposed to be a test of how much spiritual pressure one had.

We opened the doors to the waiting room and to my surprise, there was barely anyone inside. Just as we walked in, another Shinigami (I assumed he was in charge of the entrance exam for this room) came in through another door and called out, "Number 392!"

A middle aged looking man with tattered brown clothes stood up and followed the Shinigami examiner out of the room.

Toshiro and I walked to the side of the room where no one was currently sitting and sat down. I looked across the room at the remaining two occupants: two girls who were clearly older than the both of us. They had anxious expressions on their faces and were gripping each other's hands tightly. The one who seemed to be more scared looked as though she was the older of the two, while the younger girl seemed to be more worried than afraid.

I frowned. Why were they so nervous? This wasn't even a real test where you had to answer questions or perform some kind of act. Didn't they just do some kind of look over and "feel" if you have enough spiritual pressure?

A few minutes passed in silence before the Shinigami came back into the room and stated, "Number 519."

One of the girls jumped slightly, to which I deduced that she was Number 519. My assumption was affirmed when she slowly stood up and walked towards the door, turning back to look at her younger female companion before she walked through it.

Her friend, Number 520, gave her a reassuring nod and a thumbs up to which Number 519 then took a deep breath and left the room.

 _Aren't they being a bit too dramatic?_ I thought. I turned towards Toshiro, who had been so quiet that I had almost forgotten he was with me, and gave him an inquisitive look.

Despite knowing Toshiro for such a small period of time, I felt as though we could communicate certain things without having to say things out loud. I had decided that it was mainly to do with both our personalities being passive and lazy, although that applied more towards me than him.

He stared back at me and gave a subtle raise of both his shoulders, indicating that he also had no idea what was going on.

This was all done in silence, so I had assumed that the girl who was left, Number 520, would not noticed have noticed Toshiro and I's little exchange.

Apparently she was more observant than I thought, since she looked over at us and spoke out, "You two are wondering what the big deal about this entrance exam is, aren't you?"  
Toshiro gave me an exasperated look before cautiously saying, "Does the entrance exam simply not evaluate whether you have an adequate amount of spiritual pressure?"

Number 520 gave a bittersweet smile, "Yes. And in order to be able to see your maximum potential, they force you to release all of it."

I furrowed my eyebrows, "How?"

She poked a thumb towards the door, "Hana-chan, my friend who just went in? This is her second time trying. She told me that the first time she came here, they put her in a life-threatening situation to try to get her to release her reiatsu. But she didn't have enough, and she almost _died_."

"She almost died? Then why is she so keen on getting in to Shin'o a second time?" Toshiro asked. I could feel that he was skeptical about the story. To be honest, so was I. I mean, this was supposed to be a _school_ – a Shinigami school – but a school nonetheless. They wouldn't try to kill potential students…would they? I supposed that they would be trying to find the best students, but –

My thoughts were interrupted when the door swung open again and the Shinigami entered, "Number 520."

The girl (whose name I still didn't know) stood up and left with the examiner, leaving Toshiro's question unanswered.

Silence enveloped the room.

"What are we supposed to do, Toshiro? She said that they're going to try to kill us!" I half whispered – half yelled.

"You can't know for sure that she was telling the truth. She could have been trying to make us feel afraid so that we would have less confidence or maybe even back out."

"Yeah, well she was looking pretty scared herself."

Toshiro didn't reply, simply staring at the floor.

Maybe Toshiro was right. Maybe she _was_ trying to psych us out. It was working, I guess, since I felt my hands start to become clammy and my throat began to dry up. I began thinking about a plan, or something that I could do to help me pass this exam when I realized it: I knew _absolutely nothing_ about being a Shinigami. I didn't know how to exert "spiritual pressure" or anything like that. Did that mean that I was as good as dead? Would I be like Number 519 and have to come back next year?

"Oi! Kimura!" A rough voice shook me from my panicked thoughts. Toshiro placed his hand over my clenched fists, "Stop worrying, you're going to do fine no matter what happens in there."

The door swung open for the fourth time and the same tired looking Shinigami examiner came out, "Number 600."

My head snapped towards the number on my chest. In big, black characters, the number 600 stared back at me.

I felt a squeeze on my left hand. Toshiro gave me a small smile, kind of like the one Number 520 gave Number 519. But I wasn't Number 519. I was number 600.

I was Shizuka Kimura.

And I was going to ace this exam.

* * *

 **Thanks to those who reviewed, favourited, and followed this story! I love you all 3 I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Leave me a review if you have any comments! (:**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 – The Assessment

I entered the examination room slowly, giving myself time to make observations about who and what was in the room. It was a very small, regular looking room, surrounded with plain white walls and wooden floors. It was mostly empty, with the exception of a long desk placed near the wall that was opposite the one that I had entered from. Two tall windows allowed sunlight to stream into the room, obscuring the faces of the three figures who were seated at the table.

The Shinigami who had called me into the room proceeded to walk to the desk and gave each of the figures a single sheet of paper.

 _So he's not the examiner,_ I thought, _but why does there need to be three other people here?_ _Only one person should be needed to figure out whether I have enough reiatsu._ The words of the two girls that I had just met echoed in my head and I immediately grew alert to my surroundings so that I would not be caught off guard by anything.

"Come closer," a firm voice spoke. I took a few more steps toward the desk, allowing myself to see the individuals sitting there more clearly.

Three Shinigami were seated at the table and I examined each one carefully from left to right. The one seated on the left was wearing the standard Shinigami uniform and despite her efforts not to seem nervous, she was given away by the frequent glances she made to the person in the middle.

 _Whoever that is in the middle should be the person in charge_ , I decided, _that's why she keeps on looking at him._

The one on the right had on a white cross-body bag on top of his uniform and looked exhausted, given by the dark eye bags that hung beneath his overworked eyes.

The one in the middle, who had been reading a sheet of paper (which I assumed had something to do with me, although I had no idea what could have possibly been written on it, considering I had given out no information about myself) looked up at me with the same bored expression that a lot of people here seemed to have. "We're going to be conducting an exercise so we can see the full potential of your reiatsu," he began, "all you need to do is simply … **survive**."

The last word had barely registered in my brain before I felt a huge surge of power and it took everything I had not to fall on my knees instantly.

My head started spinning and despite the fact that I knew my body was on solid ground, I felt as though I was falling into the floor. My vision started warping and the image of the three individuals sitting in front of me turned black. I closed my eyes and shook my head, reopening them to see the three figures again but this time, everything was colourless.

 _Crap,_ I thought, _Am I going blind?_ I felt as though I had entered another world. Although everything was the exact same as the other one (aside from the colour), I felt detached from it. It was as though I was apart of another dimension that coexisted with the original one. Out of the corner of my eye, the flickering of a bright yellow flame contrasting against the monochrome background caught my attention. I turned my head towards it but it disappeared as soon as it had appeared. _It was probably just my imagination_.

I looked up at the Shinigami sitting at the table, meeting their expressions of astonishment. The Shinigami on the left (the one who was constantly looking for approval from the guy in the middle) made an audible gasp and stood up, slapping her palms against the surface of the table for support. She had her eyebrows scrunched up in confusion, as if this was not something that was accounted for.

The Shinigami in the middle (I had decided to nickname him "Main Guy") kept on nodding and was scribbling furiously on the sheet of paper he had in front of him.

The guy on the left seemed to finally have some life breathed into him and I could have sworn that I saw a small smile of relief appear on his face.

"…So what now?" Aside from my vision turning all wonky on me, nothing had really happened. I started wondering if I had failed the test, leading to thoughts of me having to tell Toshiro that I hadn't passed, and him laughing in my face while he went on to become the greatest Shinigami ever while I was left on the streets starving, colour-blind, and –

"Well," Main Guy's deep voice penetrating through my thoughts. "The results are quite…different than what I had expected."

"I don't – "

"Tell me…Kimura-san," he said, looking back at the paper, "What do you see right now?"

"Uhm…three – er, two people sitting at a table and one person standing and looking at me like I've just grown another arm?"

Main Guy chuckled, "Yes, but what _else_?"

"I've also lost all colour in my vision. Can that be fixed somehow? I would really appreciate being able to look at the sunset again."

"Congratulations, you've passed the test."

"What do you mean? I didn't even do anything. And I really wasn't kidding about literally becoming colour-blind a few minutes ago."

Ignoring my comment, Main Guy made a hand signal and four people dressed in white robes came and formed a square formation around me. They did some signs with their hands and clapped them together.

All of a sudden, I felt the same feeling of traveling through the floor but this time, I couldn't keep myself upright. I fell to the ground on my knees, breathing heavily and feeling exhausted. Looking at my hands on the ground, I realized that I could see the light colour of my skin against the dark floor.

My head snapped up to look at the Shinigami. He looked down at me with a small smile and motioned for someone to help me up.

As I was leaving the room, I heard his voice: "I look forward to your progress as a Shinigami."

* * *

I was completely fine by the time I was brought to another area where I was apparently supposed to get some documents regarding my admission to the Academy.

"Hey Kimura!" Toshiro's hand appeared and grabbed my arm, pulling me towards him. "You made it! I knew you would!"

"That was exhausting. I'm not even sure what I did in there," I let out a shaky laugh, "What about you? What happened to _you_?"

He looked at me, then shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets, "Huh? Nothing, I just got a bit cold."

"Oh. Wait, what!?"

Toshiro rolled his eyes and started to drag me towards a bunch of people who were waiting in a line, "Never mind, don't worry about it."

"But you – "

"I said don't worry!" He turned around, icy blue eyes staring into my own and I felt his hand grip my wrist a little tighter.

I slowly nodded, "Okay, I won't. Let's go then."

"Okay."

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

Hi guys! I know it's been a super long time since I updated, but here's another chapter! This one was quite difficult to write since I had to get the right words to express how I was imagining it in my head. It's a bit confusing but leave me a question if you don't get it! (:


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